“Being realistic is the most commonly traveled road to mediocrity. Why would you be realistic? What is the point of being realistic.”- Will Smith
These past several weeks were a time of tremendous growth in my business and as an individual. I have been blessed with new clients and opportunities. In the coming months, I will be branding a new company and beginning the hiring process, God willing. It is humbling (and staggering) to say my business has a 100% referral rate and I intend to push those numbers up.
But what happens to us when a dream begins to take shape and form? What emotions arise, what sort of inner demons begin speaking? Previously, I just wanted to pay my bills and start saving for the future while doing what I love. But I watched as a growing success turned into fear and took center stage in my life. When I was struggling to find clients and projects in the beginning, it was a different fear – one that seemed more tangible, easier to fight. But what was this new fear, I asked myself.
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.”- Marianne Williamson
Surprisingly, I found this Williamson quote to be a profound truth in my life.
What was I afraid of? Not being good enough, not being able to handle it, not being a grown-up (I swear I still feel like a kid), not skilled enough… not, not, not. But who was speaking those words to me? And why was I listening? Why do I ever listen?
I don’t have all the answers, or even a few. But I do know that I cannot succeed without believing in myself. As a believer in God, I pray everyday and my business would not be what it is without His guidance and blessings. But that does not negate the necessity of believing in myself.
As an biz owner, I am familiar with the confidence struggle. Some days are easier than others, but once a day I have to tell myself – I can do this. And what’s so crazy is that it has nothing to do with my skill set or talent. It has to do with the fear of pushing myself in my mind – the possibility of success. “Is it really possible? Are my dreams attainable? Can I make it?”
It is mind blowing for me to to sit back and take in the weight of this statement – My LIFELONG dreams will come true if I put in the work, if I don’t give up and if I give it everything I’ve got – that is HUGE. And once it began to happen, I freaked.
So I am fighting back, I am destroying my fear – one day at a time, one decision at a time, one moment at a time. And I am slowly building a ‘brick’ wall of confidence and steadfast belief in Ahna.
I am beyond thankful to my amazing clients, who have become friends and people I admire. And I canNOT wait to see what God has in store for the coming year of our business.
I want to share this incredible video with you. A client who became a friend, Mike Kawula, uploaded this video onto his Facebook page a few days ago and I have played it multiple times. The words that Will Smith speaks are pure wisdom and are exactly what I need to remember.
I’ve always had a certain delusional quality to the way I live my life.. Now I plan on turning it into something beautiful.