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Welcome back for another Soul Driven episode! This week, I’m diving into people-pleasing – a subject that typically brings up a lot of emotions. I don’t believe people-pleasing is an insecurity or character flaw, I believe it’s a trauma response from our childhood, and I want to help anyone who suffers from it.
People who know me probably have no idea that I’ve struggled with people-pleasing my entire life. I sought approval from the wrong people. I allowed my worth and value to be determined by those who didn’t do that for themselves. I agonized over saying “no” or letting someone know they hurt me. And even as a business owner, I struggled with being honest with my employees.
But over the past year, I’ve been working on overcoming people-pleasing and I am ready to share my story and process. There’s always more work to do, but I’m excited to share where it originated, why it’s harmful and ways to beat it.
Freedom is on the other side!
SHOW NOTES
In this episode, we discuss:
- New segments for the Soul Driven Podcast and Collective
- Ahna’s definition of people-pleasing
- Origins of Ahna’s people-pleasing story
- Understanding the people in your life who are people pleasers
- People-pleasing as a trauma response
- How to overcome people-pleasing
LINKS
- Join The Soul Driven Collective
- Leave a Review on iTunes
- Oprah’s childhood abuse story
- Book Recommendation: Byron Katie’s Loving What Is
If you were inspired by today’s interview, leave a review on iTunes and subscribe!
Join a spiritually curious community and find a home in The Soul Driven Collective. Or sign up for the email list to receive podcast updates and helpful resources.
And don’t forget, “When we invest in ourselves, the world benefits.”
Until next week!
QUOTES
- “I believe people-pleasing is a trauma response. It’s a trauma response for things that we have endured in our lives in an effort to keep our environment cool, calm and collect.” – Ahna Hendrix, @SoulDrivenPodcast
- “Start making different decisions to free yourself.” – Ahna Hendrix, @SoulDrivenPodcast
- “We really want our environments to be peaceful. We want people to be happy, and so we often end up sacrificing ourselves in the meantime.” – Ahna Hendrix, @SoulDrivenPodcast
- “People pleasing is giving up your personal power to appease others. It’s sacrificing ourselves in the name of someone else. It’s unhealthy dependence. It’s having a lack of boundaries. It’s caring more about the well-being of others than ourselves. It’s being someone who we aren’t.” – Ahna Hendrix, @SoulDrivenPodcast
- “People pleasing prevents us from being ourselves. It prevents us from stepping into our true power.” – Ahna Hendrix, @SoulDrivenPodcast
- “We’re so concerned about the other person, it’s amazing how easily we forget about ourselves.” – Ahna Hendrix, @SoulDrivenPodcast
- “Being vulnerable is one of the most powerful things we can do in life, being vulnerable about how we feel.” – Ahna Hendrix, @SoulDrivenPodcast
- “People pleasing is not a part of our personality, it becomes a part of our personality if we’re put in the right environment. We try to manage other people’s energy, and it’s not our job. Our job is to do what’s best for us.” – Ahna Hendrix, @SoulDrivenPodcast
- “Healing is going to take time. It’s not an overnight process. Don’t rush yourself. Be really, really kind to yourself, because this takes a lot of work.” – Ahna Hendrix, @SoulDrivenPodcast
- “This isn’t about us not caring about other people. This is understanding that if we don’t take care of ourselves, nobody else will.” – Ahna Hendrix, @SoulDrivenPodcast